most of the people i deliver good to are shut-ins or meatball-like children who are being raised by call of duty: warzone. when i was their age i was also a meatball like child but at least i was saving up all the money in my piggy bank to visit prospective groomers at the barnes and noble starbucks instead of ordering 30$ worth of boston market.
i have two degrees btw.
i double majored in undergrad in biology and fashion design (why tfffffff did I do that??? i buy most of my clothes next to the bread aisle at target (pmc walmart) and we know everything that we need to know about the human body (liquid flowing is good and buildup of plaque is bad))
there's a little text box that the customer sees when I pick up the order so I set it to say "saving up for med school" so they would feel guilty about making me drive 10 miles to their house to drop off a 30 pound bag of dog food.
sometimes one of the shutins will invite me into their home. they'll tell me their sorid little tales and sometimes they'll pour me a warm can of beer they bought at trader joes (pmc aldi(pmc just go to a regular grocery store im not paying for a cart)). i can always tell the beer is from trader joes because it will be named something truly homo like Trader Joe's Beer That When You Sniff It It's Just Like Poppers. i'll say that it's very nice they invited me into their home but now it's time to leave and they'll say something about good company and ill get back to my car and find out they only tipped me 3$
wtfffffff man.
i drive around real slow in the rain in the dark of the night and i listen to cool things like action bronson and flatbush zombies.
i think flanders dead wife is much prettier than marge simpson. how do you think flanders feels living next to the guy sort of responsible for his wife's death. If I were flanders I'd probably buy a disease on the dark web and put it in the simpson's water.
